It’s a very sad thing how little I
care about myself and how much I
care about others I’ll happily munch

Lorazepam that is 7 years out of date
found at the back of Daddy’s medicine
cabinet (I take some 4 year old Codeine

while I’m there) aware that my body is
saying no no, you stupid girl Fuck it,
I just do not care I take too many sleeping

pills and beg for release I have unprotected
sex with strangers and think about consequences
later later always later some other time I’ll be fine

But my Othello moment my fatal flaw
is caring for you more and more than ever
before when you don’t give a flying fuck

about me and my Self I care too much for
those who do not care about me and this
is what lets me down

I’d follow you down down
I’ll drag you kicking and screaming
into my private hell so you can see

how it feels to be me for a day
I’d find you hanging inside the wardrobe
next to my fur coat as handsome as ever

Helena this poem got real deep real fast
Ha I know that’s just my brain sorry
(it’s pretty messed up bon appetit!)


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